Thank you for this article! This is fascinating timing as I’m literally writing an article about power imbalances, violence, and selective Western morality from the perspective of being Lebanese. I also touch upon some 2006 war memories and other collective Lebanese/Arab trauma. Like you, I have predominantly “Western” features, a Western name, and have also rejected my Lebanese identity because of the anti-Arab sentiments in the West. People rarely guess that I’m middle eastern which makes things emotionally complicated. It’s so refreshing to see another Lebanese person writing about these topics.
Hi Tania! How exciting! This is such a crucial topic that more people should definitely talk about and I'm looking forward to reading your piece! Sending you love and I hope you're safe and sound considering recent events.
Thank you so much for this! And when people think that Hollywood or any American or Western artistic portrayal of Arabs does not matter or is not propaganda, it truly upsets me. These portrayals have become so deeply embedded within the average Western mind that Palestinians continue to be dehumanized and blamed for their own suffering and genocide.
And this is coming from a Middle Eastern who never left the Middle East, propaganda even gets to us and changes the way we think about our own people and heritage without realizing it! No one is immune to it, so this was a much-needed read!
And the fact that we get this propaganda subconsciously through children media is even more insane! And I agree with you, a lot of the Middle East has been dehumanised. Look what happened with Iraq and Afghanistan. Years later, they came back with an oopsie we shouldn't have done that. Why are we waiting for years later to have the same mindset for the Palestinians. It's like the lesson is purposefully not being learnt to fuel whatever agenda foreign powers are coming up with.
5 people die its a tradgic newstory for a week , 120 die in an middel east or african country it goes in the red box at the bottom, those years arent just ignored thire simply not counted
bahh this was so good, as someone who grew up in syria i felt this, being only 1 year away from 17 i still hold some of the resentment to our culture but i try to give myself a wake up call, my experinece is so similar to yours and so many things that you mentioned i went through it as well, as my heart still aches for my people in the coast of syria. i loved this so much and your writing made 10 times better. thank you so mhch for this.
i loved this! i was born in the UK to Tunisian parents and growing up I struggled with the issues you outlined above and feeling like i led dual lives- the tunisian girl at home and the british girl everywhere else. I also experienced the internalised hate from existing in a white, western culture (one that is known for being quite anti-immigration, xenophobic etc..) which made me reject my parents' culture, thinking that if I represented no part of if I was better than the "bad arabs"- the ones that everyone hates. Now I've reached a point where I feel I am fully myself, I do not follow islam (nor any other religion), I celebrate christmas in a secular way, and I am very british in many other facets but I speak Arabic, I am proud of my heritage and culture and I can finally see it without the western lens I was viewing it from before.
I'm really glad you found a balance that works for you, Siwar! I found I was the most complete when this internalised hate came to an end and I'm unapologetically myself and happy with it!
the way i want a part 2 rn is crazy PLEASE GET TO WRITING i was genuinely hooked throughout and nodding along in agreement with everything you wrote, no criticisms, no notes, i simple would like more if you could give it to me 😭😭🤲🏾🤲🏾
Ahhhhh that's very sweet! I'm like 70% done with part 2 and I hope to get it our for next Wednesday! Super glad you enjoyed this one, it makes me very happy (:
Thank you for writing such a powerful statement that demonstrates why we need to recenter Arab narratives in our understanding of the SWANA region. Your love of place, memories, and people as your righteous anger about how the West treats the Arab worlds in all their nuances comes through so palpably. I look forward to the next installment.
Hi Dori, thank you very much for your kind message. I hope we reach a place where not just SWANA, but all undermined ethnicities can be appreciated and regarded with no stereotypes. It's sad to see how the effects of colonisation and war can heavily affect nations—especially mentally and emotionally—these aftereffects die with us. It's hard to make us forget what we were made to feel ):
Serene, this was one of the best pieces I have read, your experiences and knowledge are teaching me so much about cultures I know little of - I cannot wait to read part two, thank you so much for part one!
And thanks for such a cogent and elegant and scary but brave essay about a place in the world, not entirely unfamiliar to me. Via history .And people that I know.
It is a long essay and well written, but I have lived through some of the story emotionally, though, vicariously and not directly.
Look forward to next Eps
And loved your photos of house/rooms so much. And am here ,if possible or wanted, but unpressured ,stay in touch. My personal email is bilbah1959@icloud .com if that helps.
Your article is so clear and profound about your discovery of your identity and heritage. The most important is to embrace the humanity in everything we learn even though the sadness of seeing contempt for other cultures and our places in them is unending. I’m from India, a Christian through my parents, all of us the products of colonialism. In India Muslim hate has gone rabid. I keep wondering how Muslim countries don’t curse us and don’t boycott us. Anyway we spent two years living in Iraq in the 1980s. We grew to love Arabic, the language, culture, food, and people. That moment of reality has always given us an insight and dislike of orientalist thinking. I support Palestine with all my heart. I support the Muslims of India, steadily made into 2nd class citizens by a horrible, lying, cheating, hateful regime. Its a difficult path to trod but I know no other and want no other. Very recently I started learning Arabic, the alphabet, words, a little grammar and a little speech. I really love it. I cannot understand the mass scale killing that western countries have been indulging in since colonial times. I am on Substack following some valuable accounts. Luckily I have not even heard of Mia Khalifa. I do like Bella and Gigi Hadid though I think they have been forced or something into silence. In the west they suffer from living in a bubbleism, parochialism, not interestedism that makes their lives rather poor and pathetic. I feel enriched by my liking for all sorts of cultures, but Palestine’s suffering, Iraq before that, and others have made me disrespect the western psyche for their ideas of superiority when they damnwell are NOT. Today I found some art on Arab culture. It was all Orientalist except for a few portraits. But the strange thing about me is that I love to wear western clothes ( also Indian, also sarees) and I like an eclectic decor with lots of western style like shabby chic. It makes me realise my confusing heritage. But we have to accept what history can’t be changed while being true to the humanity we seek in everything we do and stand for. Your article shows so much awakening. Sorry for this long reply
I truly loved this and appreciate it more than I can say. It resonated with me deeply. I don’t look Arab, and I’ve always had a foreign accent when I speak Arabic—something that’s made me feel self-conscious for as long as I can remember. But I also have an accent when I speak English, which leaves me with this lingering “man without a land” feeling. I grew up watching mostly Western media and relating more to it, to the point where I unconsciously suppressed parts of my Arab identity just to feel like I belonged somewhere. It’s a strange in-between, and it’s comforting to see it reflected so honestly. And I’m reading all these comments and I’m def in my feels for every person who has unintentionally suppressed their roots and is now trying to grow out of that. <3
My arabic accent is gone-ish, I basically sound like any international student. I was thinking about it the other day and i was really like ugh i want it back, it was this one thing about me that identified me because i'm "racially ambiguous" apparently.. i don't care if people make fun of the accent or whatever because it's not seductive like other ethnicities speaking english, it's my culture, my heritage, my everything and i really reached a point where i don't care about impressing anyone, but my people (MENA) and having all this vast knowledge on our cinema, songs, art, food across the region, .... i feel we experienced this, but the upcoming generation has learned from our mistake and i'm glad to see it really it makes me hopeful!
Thank you for this article! This is fascinating timing as I’m literally writing an article about power imbalances, violence, and selective Western morality from the perspective of being Lebanese. I also touch upon some 2006 war memories and other collective Lebanese/Arab trauma. Like you, I have predominantly “Western” features, a Western name, and have also rejected my Lebanese identity because of the anti-Arab sentiments in the West. People rarely guess that I’m middle eastern which makes things emotionally complicated. It’s so refreshing to see another Lebanese person writing about these topics.
Hi Tania! How exciting! This is such a crucial topic that more people should definitely talk about and I'm looking forward to reading your piece! Sending you love and I hope you're safe and sound considering recent events.
Thank you so much for this! And when people think that Hollywood or any American or Western artistic portrayal of Arabs does not matter or is not propaganda, it truly upsets me. These portrayals have become so deeply embedded within the average Western mind that Palestinians continue to be dehumanized and blamed for their own suffering and genocide.
And this is coming from a Middle Eastern who never left the Middle East, propaganda even gets to us and changes the way we think about our own people and heritage without realizing it! No one is immune to it, so this was a much-needed read!
And the fact that we get this propaganda subconsciously through children media is even more insane! And I agree with you, a lot of the Middle East has been dehumanised. Look what happened with Iraq and Afghanistan. Years later, they came back with an oopsie we shouldn't have done that. Why are we waiting for years later to have the same mindset for the Palestinians. It's like the lesson is purposefully not being learnt to fuel whatever agenda foreign powers are coming up with.
5 people die its a tradgic newstory for a week , 120 die in an middel east or african country it goes in the red box at the bottom, those years arent just ignored thire simply not counted
felt my heart get heavier the further I got through this. sending you a hug, Serene
Sending you one straight back, Alina <3!
bahh this was so good, as someone who grew up in syria i felt this, being only 1 year away from 17 i still hold some of the resentment to our culture but i try to give myself a wake up call, my experinece is so similar to yours and so many things that you mentioned i went through it as well, as my heart still aches for my people in the coast of syria. i loved this so much and your writing made 10 times better. thank you so mhch for this.
Praying for Syria and sending so much love! I've only ever been when I was a few years old and I hope things continue to improve!
i loved this! i was born in the UK to Tunisian parents and growing up I struggled with the issues you outlined above and feeling like i led dual lives- the tunisian girl at home and the british girl everywhere else. I also experienced the internalised hate from existing in a white, western culture (one that is known for being quite anti-immigration, xenophobic etc..) which made me reject my parents' culture, thinking that if I represented no part of if I was better than the "bad arabs"- the ones that everyone hates. Now I've reached a point where I feel I am fully myself, I do not follow islam (nor any other religion), I celebrate christmas in a secular way, and I am very british in many other facets but I speak Arabic, I am proud of my heritage and culture and I can finally see it without the western lens I was viewing it from before.
I'm really glad you found a balance that works for you, Siwar! I found I was the most complete when this internalised hate came to an end and I'm unapologetically myself and happy with it!
the way i want a part 2 rn is crazy PLEASE GET TO WRITING i was genuinely hooked throughout and nodding along in agreement with everything you wrote, no criticisms, no notes, i simple would like more if you could give it to me 😭😭🤲🏾🤲🏾
Ahhhhh that's very sweet! I'm like 70% done with part 2 and I hope to get it our for next Wednesday! Super glad you enjoyed this one, it makes me very happy (:
can’t wait!!!
Thank you for writing such a powerful statement that demonstrates why we need to recenter Arab narratives in our understanding of the SWANA region. Your love of place, memories, and people as your righteous anger about how the West treats the Arab worlds in all their nuances comes through so palpably. I look forward to the next installment.
Hi Dori, thank you very much for your kind message. I hope we reach a place where not just SWANA, but all undermined ethnicities can be appreciated and regarded with no stereotypes. It's sad to see how the effects of colonisation and war can heavily affect nations—especially mentally and emotionally—these aftereffects die with us. It's hard to make us forget what we were made to feel ):
I need part 2😭
Serene, this was one of the best pieces I have read, your experiences and knowledge are teaching me so much about cultures I know little of - I cannot wait to read part two, thank you so much for part one!
Hi Serene (if I have correct)
And thanks for such a cogent and elegant and scary but brave essay about a place in the world, not entirely unfamiliar to me. Via history .And people that I know.
It is a long essay and well written, but I have lived through some of the story emotionally, though, vicariously and not directly.
Look forward to next Eps
And loved your photos of house/rooms so much. And am here ,if possible or wanted, but unpressured ,stay in touch. My personal email is bilbah1959@icloud .com if that helps.
Stay Safe. But have Fun.
this was a great read - thanks for sharing your story and wishing you all the best 🤍
Your article is so clear and profound about your discovery of your identity and heritage. The most important is to embrace the humanity in everything we learn even though the sadness of seeing contempt for other cultures and our places in them is unending. I’m from India, a Christian through my parents, all of us the products of colonialism. In India Muslim hate has gone rabid. I keep wondering how Muslim countries don’t curse us and don’t boycott us. Anyway we spent two years living in Iraq in the 1980s. We grew to love Arabic, the language, culture, food, and people. That moment of reality has always given us an insight and dislike of orientalist thinking. I support Palestine with all my heart. I support the Muslims of India, steadily made into 2nd class citizens by a horrible, lying, cheating, hateful regime. Its a difficult path to trod but I know no other and want no other. Very recently I started learning Arabic, the alphabet, words, a little grammar and a little speech. I really love it. I cannot understand the mass scale killing that western countries have been indulging in since colonial times. I am on Substack following some valuable accounts. Luckily I have not even heard of Mia Khalifa. I do like Bella and Gigi Hadid though I think they have been forced or something into silence. In the west they suffer from living in a bubbleism, parochialism, not interestedism that makes their lives rather poor and pathetic. I feel enriched by my liking for all sorts of cultures, but Palestine’s suffering, Iraq before that, and others have made me disrespect the western psyche for their ideas of superiority when they damnwell are NOT. Today I found some art on Arab culture. It was all Orientalist except for a few portraits. But the strange thing about me is that I love to wear western clothes ( also Indian, also sarees) and I like an eclectic decor with lots of western style like shabby chic. It makes me realise my confusing heritage. But we have to accept what history can’t be changed while being true to the humanity we seek in everything we do and stand for. Your article shows so much awakening. Sorry for this long reply
Beautiful writing, I love that you are educating through storytelling.
I truly loved this and appreciate it more than I can say. It resonated with me deeply. I don’t look Arab, and I’ve always had a foreign accent when I speak Arabic—something that’s made me feel self-conscious for as long as I can remember. But I also have an accent when I speak English, which leaves me with this lingering “man without a land” feeling. I grew up watching mostly Western media and relating more to it, to the point where I unconsciously suppressed parts of my Arab identity just to feel like I belonged somewhere. It’s a strange in-between, and it’s comforting to see it reflected so honestly. And I’m reading all these comments and I’m def in my feels for every person who has unintentionally suppressed their roots and is now trying to grow out of that. <3
My arabic accent is gone-ish, I basically sound like any international student. I was thinking about it the other day and i was really like ugh i want it back, it was this one thing about me that identified me because i'm "racially ambiguous" apparently.. i don't care if people make fun of the accent or whatever because it's not seductive like other ethnicities speaking english, it's my culture, my heritage, my everything and i really reached a point where i don't care about impressing anyone, but my people (MENA) and having all this vast knowledge on our cinema, songs, art, food across the region, .... i feel we experienced this, but the upcoming generation has learned from our mistake and i'm glad to see it really it makes me hopeful!
You are seriously talented and gifted! As a fellow arab myself, your writing hit home. Thank you for bringing light into what it feels.
I’m sorry to see you feel this way too 😔 it’s really sad to see a comment section feeling this way, this shouldn’t be relatable yet it is ..